I know this is my first post here, and it is a less than good time to introduce myself. This started as an email, and I figured it would be better served here. I am at home now after a very long and difficult night. Cara is still at the hospital, and will be at least tonight, and I plan on spending the evening with her after I get some stuff squared away at the house (stupid dog).
Not really sure what I want to say here, or how to say it. I have had a pretty good mental state for the last few hours, eyes only welling up a few times at songs on the radio on the drive home, unlike yesterday where it was pretty constant. And I think delving too far into last night could make me a blubbering mess if I think too hard.
Cara was amazing last night. Beautiful, poised, confident and strong. A lot stronger than I have been. Maybe it was the fact that she had a feeling of what she needed to do, and I was stuck there holding her hand feeling helpless, but she was incredible. The kids were born between 8:25 and about 10:30 last night. It only took one round of medication, and they came out in the expected order, and with the personalities that have exhibited in the ultrasounds from day 1.
We got to spend an hour or two, I really am not sure, holding the three of them. We have a few pictures, and they may get shown, but I’m not really sure. We were both very excited, and in excruciating amounts of anguish to be with them. They were beautiful, with one looking like me, another looking like Cara, and the third a nice mix of the two of us (though all of them had the big flat Key nose).
At some point about 1am we were taken upstairs to a recovery room, and we were finally able to get a little bit of sleep, though calling it ‘sleep’ may be pushing it. Today was spent doing administration items, meeting with more doctors and nurses, and us doing a lot of crying.
I am sure Cara will do a post at some point today, she may even be working on it now for all I know, but I kinda wanted to have a (little bit of a) voice in this.
To say this was the hardest week of my life may be a bit of an understatement. I’ve hardly eaten, showered or slept since Monday, and I am looking forward to Cara coming home so that there may be some sense of normalcy brought back into our lives.